Skip to main content

Discovery Period - Part 3

We have reached the final installment of this blog series.  I've never done a blog series before.  I heard that it was a lot easier to do a few small posts than to try to do a dissertation.  Here's to another first in The Plus Diaries.  Wow, 2016 hasn't been too bad for this blog and I am looking forward to 2017.  But, let's continue as to why I've gathered you all here.  

I am definitely going through some early end of year and super early birthday changes.  If you have missed anything, let me catch you up - this blog is growing, I'm making changes to my social media, #TPDchat is coming to a screen near you soon, new Facebook page arrives on January 1, I'm in a relationship, and I have never been closer to my parents than I am right now.  Two posts, one long sentence.  Without further ado, let's dive into part three.  

The scariest part of this period is the fact that I can actually see it happening.  I can't remember a time in my life when I was changing and I could see it so vividly.  Everything has always been so subtle, but right now it's front and center!  The hardest part I'm going through right now is my transition to find a new church home.  Hard?  Yes.  Very hard.  I've met so many wonderful people there and it actually hurts to leave a place that did so much for me in a time when I felt like I was at the very bottom.  No, I'm not talking about them giving me any type of money.  I'm talking about them giving me something money cannot buy - the tools I needed to keep my head about the water when I feel like I'm drowning.  

I wrote earlier that I was not ready to tell you what I was looking for in a church.  However, now, I feel this moment and this post is a better place to explain myself.  Growing up, I attended a traditional church.  Nothing fancy by any means, but it was just certain things I enjoyed.  I liked the fact babies were dedicated because you grow up learning that you must raise your children right.  That baby dedication, to me, is a covenant between the parents and God to do just that.  I grew up having communion every first Sunday.  I grew up in a church where marriage counseling was happening (and still happening).  As I get older and I look to more adult things, I see those traditions meaning a lot more to me and I need to be at a place where those things are carried out.  

Another scary thing - I know I'm losing friends.  Truthfully, I know I'm losing friends because of this blog.  I've been asked why do you write so much or would you really call your blog work.  Well, I write so much because I want to and yes, I call it work.  It's hard work.  These posts don't write themselves and these graphics, I'm still learning how to make them perfect for what I'm trying to convey and the vibe I want people to feel.  Photos?  I can't even begin to tell you how long it takes to edit a photo or look for a stock photo because it just has to be perfect.  If you had started a blog, a business, or even reading a book, wouldn't you see it through to the end and put in the work for that to happen?  If you answered yes, well, I think you understand.  If you answered no, what could you have accomplished but not willing to put in the work to make it happen?  Friends - true friends - accept every aspect of you, even those parts that are absolutely weird and ridiculous and seem to be working all the time.  True friends allow you to shine during your greatest moments.  They also allow you to sulk when the day hasn't been so great.  Find those friends.  Believe me, they are few and far between.  

But remember this one thing - do not confuse friends with associates.  In my opinion, associates are there to take from you.  They take your energy, they take your happiness, and they take until you have nothing left to give them.  Once you are of no use to them, they are gone.  However, after they are gone, they've used you up to the point you have nothing to give yourself.  That's a tragedy.  Those people, keep them at a safe distance.  Keep them just close enough that you can keep an eye on them because you need to be able to see them coming.  

Finally, I'm trying new things!  This part is exciting for me because new things bring new opportunities to be epic.  If you are following me on Instagram, you have seen a lot more makeup photos, #ootd (outfit of the day) photos, and selfies in general.  Why?  Well, I can't just hide behind the computer screen and only let you see me after a photo shoot.  I'm human and most days, I'm not getting up early enough to wear makeup.  I'll always have something on my lips, even if it is just a moisturizing balm or a gloss.  However, don't be surprised if some blue lip color shows up on your feed soon!  

You see me with a naked face more times than you see me with a full face.  As for natural, you also get to see my natural hair journey and how many twists and bantu knots I have to put in my hair to achieve certain looks.  Oh, it's not cute at all during the twisting stage, but the final results are awesome.   

I think I'm taking new risks.  Although people find it very hard to believe, I am an introvert.  I am highly selective about places I go and people I am around.  Honestly, I can be at a friend's house and if the vibe changes to something I'm not cool with, I'm leaving.  It's just that simple.  My introvertedness (yup, made that all the way up) is part of what makes me who I am and I am perfectly fine with it.  However, I am stepping out of my comfortable box and making an effort to go out more, but there is nothing like peace, quiet, and knowing I am in the same space as my memory foam mattress on my beautiful queen-size bed (that I basically hijacked from my parents).

Well, there you have it!  It's a weird time, but I'm having a blast.  This purge (yep, I call it that) has come a lot earlier than normal, but I'm cool with that.  It's not like I can control the time or anything.  I ask you, if you feel like your life is changing, don't try to stop it.  Instead, go along for the ride and see where it leads.  Who knows, you might end up in another city, with a new job, or with the chance to travel the world.  Whatever it is, embrace it and enjoy the journey.  As you enjoy the journey, remember key parts because one day, someone is going to need your help and you get to tell them all about your experience navigating this life.  It's not like we go through what we go through to not help the next generation. 

What new adventures have you taken so far this year and how have they changed you? 

Now, I will end this post the way the show Heartbeat ended one night.  Although it only lasted one season, I did learn some powerful lessons and that was enough for me.    


Popular posts from this blog

Many Years of Thursdays

Trigger Warning: Sexual Assault

I had a blog post ready to type.  I was going to tell you about my birthday month and all the fun I had during March celebrating with family and friends.  And then, Thursday, March 28 happened and Grey's Anatomy hit me with Episode 19 of Season 15 titled Silent All These Years.  As hard as it was for me to admit my story, when I posted tweets about being triggered and the experience, I finally typed WE instead of simply saying you.  

I along with many people were triggered by that episode that night.  Quite frankly, it's hard for me to write this post, but I'm going to push through.  

My typical Thursday looks like this - work, workout, do a devotion/bible study, eat, shower.  At 8pm EST, I am only communicating via Twitter because I'm going all the way in with the live tweets and enjoying my time with the Grey's Anatomy and Station 19 viewers.  It's part of my boundary that I am strongly holding on to this year.  However, that part…


Disclaimer: I will be mentioning my Christianity.  It's not the full topic of conversation, but it will be in here in a few spots.  Proceed with caution.  

"He has kids because God knew when you met him, you wouldn't act right."
This isn't the first time this has been said to me.  Well, not in these words.  It's always something and then you wouldn't act right.  Now the first time this was said to me, I got a bit spicy.  As it has been a continued phrase in my life, I honestly haven't paid it that much attention.  Why?  I know my relationship with myself and I know my relationship with Christ.  So, I did tell you that religion was not going to be a big thing in here, so I won't drop scripture on you.  However, we are going to have a little chat about energy. 

I've been extremely in tune with myself lately.  I've accepted a few things about myself...

I'm an empath I'm healing I'm on a path of discovery
Did you noticed how I took…


Ayesha Curry has been the talk of all the innanets for about two weeks now.  I'm not going to dwell on this because I have other things to discuss.  However, I will say that I wished she would have kept that in a private family conversation.  Just because you are in the light doesn't mean it all has to be in the light.  Also, I get it.  We all want to feel wanted.  Even the people clowning on her want to be wanted.  But go on ahead and continue to go off about her living a lavish life when you cannot figure out how to live your best one.  Moving on...

I didn't do my first Wednesday post this month.  Yall are just going to be hearing from me once in May.  But, I try to be as transparent as I am comfy with.  So, without telling too much, let's just say the end of April and the first 12 days of May have been a horrible hell that I didn't even know could exist.  However, I'm moving along and still standing. Let's be real - anxiety is a real piece of work!