Skip to main content

Environmental Instability

Remember that post from Sunday?  Well here is the follow up.  

I'm happy.  Even on days I have to force myself to be happy, I am.  What I have discovered is that I'm not happy with the environments I have found myself in.  

For instance, my day job.  I love what I do.  I'm happy with what I do and I do believe that I'm pretty good at it.  What I'm not happy about is the new environment that has happened around me.  I've been told that I'm intimidating to the high ranking person in my office because I have a lot of knowledge.  I don't plan on pretending to be dumb to make anybody feel better about what they should be doing.  In turn, that has turned the office into a bit of a wannabe hostile place.  

What I do is very simple, I go to the office, I work, keep my head down, go home. Repeat Monday thru Friday.  I keep my headphones in, do a little dance at my desk, get in a good laugh, and get my work done.  It's not my fault because you don't like to ask me questions because I have a lower rank than you.  It's not my fault that even when you ask me a question, you have to run to someone else and verify what I saw.  It's not my fault that your actions have frustrated me enough that I don't even want to talk to you without someone being present.  It's not my fault that your actions have caused me to keep a notebook of what happens in our office on a daily basis.  

See, my environment has changed and I have no clue what to do with it.  But some news that I learned last week definitely got me on the move to find something else.  I spend the majority of my waking day at work.  If that is a rough environment, why would I want to be there?

Here's to change.  Here's to change coming in its own time.  Here's to me standing up for myself until change comes.  Here's to holding on to hope.  


Popular posts from this blog

Save Yourself

I am so proud of myself.  I have a tendency to just want to help people, even if it hurts myself.  This year, I've made it a point to focus on self-care.  Not being mean or selfish, but I need to make sure Tameika is good first.  

A couple of weeks ago, someone in my life needed something.  They never asked, but they kept dropping hints about what they needed.  Last year, I would have just offered to help.  This year, that's not going to be the case.  Well, the situation has worked itself out.  That's a great thing.  

Honestly, even if the question would have been asked, I would not have helped.  Why?  I'm glad you asked...

It's because for the first time in a few years, I'm finally coming first in my own life.  I'm taking my life back and it feels so wonderful.  I hope this lasts and that the people around me support what I'm doing.  

I can't keep draining myself in order to support others.  Since I'm such an advocate for self-care, it's time f…

Days of family past

My final post of the year had some cool questions.  I'm going to use this post to answer those questions.  Do not worry, I'm not going to tell who asked what (because I want to protect you from the possible wrath).  I'm just going to answer them.

1 - What is your relationship with your cousin? I have no relationship with my cousin.  In fact, I reference this person as my dad's sister's child.  That relationship ended on August 21, 2017.
2 - What do you think caused this reaction from your cousin? Honestly, I don't have an answer for you.  Of course, my parentals and I have talked at length about it and both told me what they believe to be the cause.  I would rather not say because I want to keep their lives as peaceful as possible and not have to deal with this particular person.  
3 - How do you feel about being around your cousin? I don't want to be around my dad's sister's child.  As far as I am concerned, this person told me exactly what they felt abo…

Year End Review - Edition 2017

This is typically the hardest post for me to write.  You would think I would be used to it by now since I do it every single year, but it doesn't get easier.  I truly think they get more interesting though.  And believe me, 2017 was one for the books.  But let's get to how amazing this year actually was.  

First quarter of the year is always a bit interesting because I get to enjoy Winter and my birthday!  A new person was born into the family and she was absolutely perfect.  She still is and I just enjoy her so, even though I don't see her often.  But what makes her so great to me is that she was born on my actual due date.  Kindred spirit, maybe?  And in thrilling fashion, I celebrated my birthday an entire usual.  It was fun times with my friends and I absolutely had a blast with my parentals.  
The second quarter was a bit quiet.  I finally came up with a blog schedule and I really needed that to happen.  That was also when I sort of regrouped and decided to t…